Jason Lange on Redefining Masculinity and Cultivating Authentic Male Connections

Jason Lange on Redefining Masculinity and Cultivating Authentic Male Connections

Jason is the founder of Evolutionary Men, an organization on the front lines of the men's mental health movement. This is a conversation I've been very eager to have…

Jason Lange with his wife Violet and his daughter Ruby

Frequent listeners of this podcast will know that this is one of my persistent concerns. There is a crisis of male loneliness and isolation, not just in this country, but globally. What stands out to me more than anything is that it seems to be affecting men most adversely, specifically at the ages of 16 to 24. Young men are bearing the brunt of isolation and loneliness. That's pretty abnormal. Usually, the distributions that we see from male loneliness and isolation historically have been as men age, not at the beginning of their lives. This means that we're getting worse as a society at making men feel connected, not better. That's something that should concern all of us.

There are plenty of theories circulating out there as to why—smartphones, social media, porn, dating apps, etc. We get into all of that. We also get into the cultural headwinds that are making this conversation so complex in 2024—the ever-expanding and confusing definition of toxic masculinity, the apparent disconnect between what women say they want from men and what men actually experience in the dating world, and the shifting expectations of men as providers and leaders. 

But ultimately, this is a conversation about how to move forward and how to live authentically as a man in a world that is renegotiating its relationship to masculinity. In seeming real time, we spend a lot of time unpacking the traditional models of masculinity, why current role models for masculinity are so hard to find, and then we explore what a new, modernized role model for masculinity might look like, one that honors the equality of women while also respecting the unique gifts and challenges that men face.

As you'll see, Jason's solution is as simple as it is powerful. Men need to spend more time together. I couldn't agree more. Jason speaks powerfully about the men's group work he has done and the first-hand transformations he's seen when men just start talking to each other. He explains how to build your own men's group, either formally or informally. He shares some great ideas on how to do this, and he explains how to create greater depth in the male relationships that are already in your life.

This is not just a conversation for or about men. Masculinity and femininity are defined by their relationship to each other and, as you'll see in this conversation, so much of what men internalize and care about when it comes to masculinity is based on what women value, both implicitly and explicitly. So this is not just a conversation for men. It's also a conversation for any woman who has a man in their life that they care about or that cares about them. Restoring sanity and clarity to men is a project for all of us, and it's one we're all going to benefit from. 

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Jason Lange on Redefining Masculinity and Cultivating Authentic Male Connections
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0:03 - Men's Mental Health in 2024
11:51 - Healthy Masculinity and Personal Growth
25:48- Male Bonding and Communication
34:10 - Masculine and Feminine Energy in Relationships
46:03- Men's Work and Dating Challenges
52:42 - Navigating Online Dating and Real-Life Connections
58:30 - Exploring Inner Growth and Finding Purpose
1:08:10 - Masculinity and Finding Purpose
1:13:47 - Oscar Favorites and Relational Fitness Importance

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Written by

Casey Wright